So what is it with copywriting and packaging nowadays? Can we blame Innocent for encouraging the infantilisation of it all, as if we won't buy the product unless we're spoken to in an ickle funny tone of voice?
Oat milk brand Oatly are my new favourite purveyors of this. On one side of the carton it says:
The boring (but very important) side
If this side bores you, please read no further. Flip the carton around and have a wonderful day. Otherwise, please do enjoy.
And on another side:
Nobody reads the side of packages
Because they are usually full of dull and boring words. Not this package. Nope. This package is single-minded and super-focussed.
It goes on a bit to say how good the product is for your heart.
And if your heart is happy, well then other people will notice and good things will happen to you.
What exactly? Well I am just the guy writing this so I have no idea. But you can try it yourself and see what happens and then call me and tell me if I was right. My name is John. +46 709 10 10 49.
So I rang him up. And got his voicemail saying he was away on holiday. John! JOHN! Now I've got no one to chat to about oaty milky products.